The Wanderer

Hey friends! Sorry for the lack of posts, it’s been absolutely crazy at work lately. I’ve been traveling for 3 weeks straight with 2 more on the way. And in between all that I’ve had commitments with friends and family, personal and professional events, and of course, the plethora of workouts every day. I’ll be honest with you all, not that I need to, but because this thing we got going with us is important. I’m opening myself up in this blog, in my writing, and I appreciate each and every one of you who tune in every week. Away from the sappy stuff for a moment, if y’all have been here long enough you know the sappy stuff is never far with me, I want to tell you all that this weekend I broke 75 hard. Yup, even though I worked out every day this weekend, I drank alcohol. I had a good reason though! It was my birthday last Saturday and I wanted to celebrate properly. I had a great weekend with my friends and I don’t regret it. There, that feels good to get that off my chest. Now obviously when you break something as long as 75 hard, you’re left with a choice. Do you go back to your old ways? Or do you keep going.

Before we get into that decision, I want to reflect not only on 75 hard, but the year so far. Work has been exhausting but productive, I’ve been able to make moves and hopefully new opportunities are coming in the near future. My relationship has been going strong as well. Tanvi and I have been dating for almost 5 months now, which isn’t a long time, but its the longest I’ve been with someone and I find that important. I’ve found a lot of time to be creative, using this gift to outlet my feelings and bring me peace. I find writing therapeutic. This blog is as much for me as it is for you. I’ve had easily the best month of the blog’s history, I’ve been able to grow my following and its been a hell of a journey. I can’t thank you all enough for everything we’ve made so far, and I can’t wait to see what comes next. I’ve been writing my new book as well, more coming soon on that. The book started as a short story, but as I mature with my writing and think about the importance of this story more, I find it growing larger and larger. More complete. I find that this book mimics my life at times, not only in the content, but also in its potential. Even though I just turned 24 I still feel like a kid, learning and growing, finding new paths, making mistakes, and getting better and better each day. I see this in my writing, at the gym, at work and with my relationships.

Now on to the gym. 31 days in and I feel absolutely powerful. My lifts have all gotten higher, my body is slowly but surely getting more chiseled, and my mental clarity is through the roof. I need every bit of this clarity on travel weeks, so making sure I am disciplined enough to work out twice a day has been crucial to my well being. It has not been easy, nor should it be, but making this commitment to myself feels important. I’ve found that yoga is a game changer. Doing it every day has increased my flexibility as well as building my mental fortitude. It feels nice to dedicate 20-30 minutes of your day just to breath and stretch. By no means are these workouts easy, I’m half tempted to switch leg day to yoga day, accomplishing them and getting better at the art has been a fantastic experience.

I’m writing this a few days later, but Tuesday January 30th was the day I wanted to highlight this week. Tuesday morning I got up and went to work around 8am. I worked pretty much non stop for about 10 hours and came back to my hotel room. I’m staying at this hotel that doesn’t have a good gym, just some dumbbells and a treadmill, so instead of doing a traditional workout I did yoga in my room, using the TV to stream a yoga with Adrienne video. That’s all I could manage to do that day. I was so exhausted from work I had no energy to workout. But by some miracle I got the motivation to get some yoga done before going to sleep at like 9:30pm. You might be thinking, that’s not two workouts, this was a boring day, why are you blogging about this? Who cares? I’m talking about this day because not every day is going to be the best day every. Hell, most days are perfectly normal, and most people are just trying to find a way to get through. This was one of those days for me. It was long and hard, and at the end of it I didn’t want to do anything. But despite that, I got out of bed and did the impossible. And for that day, that was enough.

Travel weeks are really hard, being completely alone in a cookie cutter hotel room, working long hours in a factory while all the people I care about are far away. But in these moments I find myself pushing myself forward in any way I can. I hate feeling complacent or lazy, I hate the feeling of knowing I could be doing something when I’m not. And when you sit with that long enough your mind starts running. And you find yourself faced with a decision. Do you give up, find something else to do, and turn back? Or do you rage against the dark night and emerge victorious in the light?

Or do you find balance somewhere in between.